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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
> TO WOMEN EVERYWHERE, FROM A MAN WHO'S HAD ENOUGH !
> >
> >
> > 1-Learn to work the toilet seat. If it's up, put it down.
> > We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us bitching
> > about you leaving it down.
> >
> > 2-If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls,
> > don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.
> >
> > 3-If you think you're fat, you probably are.
> > Don't ask us. We refuse to answer.
> >
> > 4-Don't cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more
> > attractive than short hair. One of the big reasons guys
> > fear getting married is that married women always cut
> > their hair, and by then you're stuck with her.
> >
> > 5-Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests
> > to see if we can find the perfect present yet again!
> >
> > 6-If you ask a question you don't want an answer to,
> > expect an answer you don't want to hear.
> >
> > 7-Sometimes, we're not thinking about you. Live with it.
> > Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are
> > prepared to discuss such topics as navel lint,
> > the shotgun formation, or monster trucks.
> >
> > 8-Sunday = Sports. It's like the full moon or the
> > changing of the tides. Let it be.
> >
> > 9-Shopping is not a sport, and no, we're never going
> > to think of it that way.
> >
> > 10-When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything
> > you wear is fine. Really.
> >
> > 11-You have enough clothes.
> >
> > 12-You have too many shoes.
> >
> > 13-Crying is blackmail.
> >
> > 14-Ask for what you want. Let's be clear on this one:
> > Subtle hints don't work.
> > Strong hints don't work.
> > Really obvious hints don't work.
> > Just say it!
> >
> > 15-We don't know what day it is. We never will.
> > Mark anniversaries on the calendar.
> >
> > 16-Peeing standing up is more difficult.
> > We're bound to miss sometimes.
> >
> > 17-Most guys own three pairs of shoes.
> > What makes you think we'd be any good at choosing
> > which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your
> > dress?
> >
> > 18-Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to
> > almost every question.
> >
> > 19-Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.
> > That's what we do.
> >
> > 20-Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
> >
> > 21-A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem.
> > See a doctor.
> >
> > 22-Foreign films are best left to foreigners.
> >
> > 23-Check your oil.
> >
> > 24-It is neither in your best interest nor ours
> > to take the quiz together
> >
> > 25-No, it doesn't matter which quiz.
> >
> > 26-Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
> > All comments become null and void after 7 days.
> >
> > 27-If something we said can be interpreted two ways,
> > and one of the ways makes you sad or angry,
> > we meant the other one.
> >
> > 28-Let us ogle. We're going to look anyway; it's genetic.
> >
> > 29-You can either tell us to do something OR
> > tell us how to do something but not both.
> >
> > 30-Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during
> > commercials.
> >
> > 31-ALL men see in only 16 colors. Peach is a fruit, not a color.
> >
> > 32-If it itches, it will be scratched.
> >
> > 33-Beer is as exciting for us as handbags are for you.
> >
> > 34-If we ask what's wrong and you say "nothing,"
> > we will act like nothing's wrong.
> > We know you're lying, but it's just not worth the hassle.
> >
> > 35-What the hell is a doily?
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Well im at work today and e-mailed this to my significant other first thing. I figure she will have all day to adjust her attitude.LOL

Who says I'm not sensitive?
 

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Well...if you weren't sensitive before, you will be when you wake up where she hit you with the fryin' pan...and I don't mean the light Teflon thingee' either...
:lol:
 
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